Partner’s Death Changed Everything
When my friend and business partner died , I was thrust into the role of “the personal representative “ of her estate. My diversified life and business experience and education helped me be prepared and qualified for this role but what happened exceeded my wildest expectations.
My friend’s sudden death when her heart stopped was an immediate shock and I had so questions I wanted answered from her caregiver.
The number of hours I’ve spent on this journey of handling the estate has been so much more than most people believed reasonable or real. The compensation will never be enough for having my life threatened and the medical and physical dangers I encountered handling matters.
I agreed to this role of personal representative and in meeting other heirs I felt happy that I was the person taking care of the estate. I am in Florida and I know how to evaluate and renovate property to make it more appealing and profitable. I have the MBA in Real Estate Development and Management and the licenses including Auctioneer and Real Estate Salesperson which made some aspects of the estate easier to handle than for many other possible personal representatives.
I researched and had to find a qualified and appropriate company to clean out the house of any toxins. I hired a Crime Scene Clean-Up company. In addition to the clean up I respectfully also called Stanley Steamer to clean again and clean the air ducts thoroughly.
We have such a big responsibility during this crazy Covid times to protect ourselves and just make sure that we are setting situations up correctly for others we will work with and around. This was not a Covid-related death but with hiring a team of professionals to take action I was able to get the property cleaned up and prepared for sale.
In fact, I’m sure that more people will want to know that their families and estates will benefit if they can have me as their “Personal Rep.” I’m in the Sunshine State of Florida and here we have the best weather- aside from a few stormy or cold days each year- and everyone comes here at some time from around the world.
With our aging population in Florida, my friend as many other friends of the family have had stories dealing with home healthcare workers or assisted living type facilities that would make your hair stand up on ends. I am going to share what I’ve learned and pray that I save others from some of the pain, heartache, losses and sleepless nights of dealing with loved ones who are sick and dying.
It can be the worst feeling to lose someone you love and also have to find out after it’s too late that many of their precious valuables, your family heirlooms, their jewelry, fine china or designer clothing and accessories have been stolen and are not recoverable and you need police reports and insurance claims and more.
Why do we want to have heartbreaking losses and the heartache of the loss of someone you love and cared about. It’s too much pain and we have to do better for ourselves and our families. We are not prepared to be mislead or lied to or robbed.
That’s why if you read this story you cannot wait to take action and prepare not regret your inactions and procrastination. The criminals do not procrastinate, they take it while they can, whenever the opportunity presents itself. You cannot leave them more opportunities. We do not have to be vulnerable by ignorance and lack of reality.
What was my first step after finding out my friend died and that I had a huge job to do as the Personal Representative? I made immediate plans to get to her home and to get inside and see what condition it was left in and to get in my possession assets that would easily be removed from the house by someone else if not by me first.
My friend and business associate lived in a gated community so there was the issue of having to make an appointment with the caretaker who was staying at her home. I also needed an agreement that person would call me in to the complex security gate so the guard would let me into the housing complex. I also needed to know before driving to the complex and wasting my time, energy and gas that this caretaker would do the right thing .
It was important to know that I was going to gain entry to the house when I arrived and that she was going to open the front door and let me inside.
Time was of the essence and I made an appointment for the first thing in the morning. I tried for an early time but got the caretaker to agree on a 10am visit from me.
I had to gather my composure and tell myself that I would stay calm with the caretaker and not get out of control with anger about my friend dying. The first step for me in the household was to consider the most valuable items that my friend would have had on her at the time of passing and find those items.
I asked about the diamond earrings, the designer watch , the diamond tennis bracelet and diamond ring. The diamond ring was in the safe deposit box and the diamond earring were already gone.
I secured the diamond tennis bracelet and more family heirlooms and locked in a safe deposit box. Here’s some of the empty boxes found in drawers- It made me angry to know they were filled and now empty. I learned that if you designate an item to someone in your Will and it’s gone, nothing happens. It’s just gone. Many wills do not even specify that there’s anything else given to that heir to replace the missing item.
How many grieving heirs want to get the police involved to investigate items stolen while their loved one was sick or dying? Who’s got the extra energy to do all of this or to know how or know where to start. What do you tackle first?
Is it wrong to care about the missing diamonds or designer watch? Is is right to be upset about all the missing pieces of beautiful fine china sets that were once the centerpiece of large family gatherings or entertaining?
There’s so much that happened with the house with the lawyers, with the family and neighbors and community, and the heirs that I promise to take you with me on this journey to settling the estate as a personal representative. My life was even in danger so stay tuned.
If you or a loved one expect to be needing home healthcare soon, please take an inventory of what you have that is potentially valuable or would be attractive and easy for others to take from your home to theirs. You might want to consider which items you’ll want to remove from your home before having others at your home on a regular basis who could be tempted by the beautiful things you own.
My response to these important life-changing events has been to create a plan for families to protect their families and their valuables and to launch an Auction business and an asset evaluation company . Be sure that you take the time to figure things out in advance of a crisis if at all possible. I’m going to work with families and organizations to help people figure these things out and to help those who want to get Cash Now from auctions and other actions both online and at live events or locations in South Florida.
